In Too Deep
A few months ago as I was sitting at the switchboard a lady called telling me that she wanted to believe that God loved her, but she couldn't believe. As this is not a crisis hotline, I was completely taken off guard. This lady was looking for someone to counsel her. Slightly annoyed that someone was calling looking for free counseling and completely paralyzed with shock and fear of saying the wrong thing I nervously stumbled through telling her that God loved her. Gee, big help I was, I thought to myself.
Well she called again tonight. Our conversation lasted about 15 minutes this time. Whether or not I did any good for the situation I do not know. She really wasn't in any state to explain what was bothering her, but it had something to do with not being able to distinguish between God and Satan. Frustrated with the fact that she was being so vague and spooky about the whole thing, I had to remind myself that even though the things she was telling me were disturbing me and quite frankly freaking me out, I needed to not write her off as a wacko. What she needed was a friend. A friend who understood her confusion. A friend who would pray for her. A friend who would not look down on her for saying crazy things. A friend who would challenge her to take some kind of responsibility for her own recovery.
I will admit that I am a little uncomfortable talking about spiritual warfare. Do I believe in it? YES. Do I know what it looks like? NO. Who am I to tell this lady what she should do in order to be free from the forces that were at work within her? She wants me to solve her problem for her. I let her know that I honestly don't know how to help her. The only thing I can offer her is prayer and some empathetic understanding. I care about what you're going through, I tell her. I offer to pray for her.
And this all makes me think about humility in the counseling profession. Hopefully none of you by reading this think that I lack it too much for sharing this story. I am not trying to pat myself on the back at all. I am going to have to develop a lot of humility in the next few years if I am going to make it in the profession. This experience reminds me of how nerve-wracking talking to an unstable person really is. When I admit that I don't have the slightest clue what I am doing, that is when I rely on God. And that is the best place to be...both for me and the other person.
I don't want to be a solution-maker for people. People will want to raise me up to a non-human level, asking for things I can't give them. I'll be tempted to offer pat-solutions to "fix" them. But I think people need to make their own solutions. It takes some of the pressure off of me and it also makes people responsible for their own lives. I'm going to be there to help them filter what solutions might be plausible, what might be the most effective...but the truth is that I really don't know for sure. Luckily I think counseling is more about loving the other person than offering them answers. Leaves more room for God's grace to work, now doesn't it?
Well she called again tonight. Our conversation lasted about 15 minutes this time. Whether or not I did any good for the situation I do not know. She really wasn't in any state to explain what was bothering her, but it had something to do with not being able to distinguish between God and Satan. Frustrated with the fact that she was being so vague and spooky about the whole thing, I had to remind myself that even though the things she was telling me were disturbing me and quite frankly freaking me out, I needed to not write her off as a wacko. What she needed was a friend. A friend who understood her confusion. A friend who would pray for her. A friend who would not look down on her for saying crazy things. A friend who would challenge her to take some kind of responsibility for her own recovery.
I will admit that I am a little uncomfortable talking about spiritual warfare. Do I believe in it? YES. Do I know what it looks like? NO. Who am I to tell this lady what she should do in order to be free from the forces that were at work within her? She wants me to solve her problem for her. I let her know that I honestly don't know how to help her. The only thing I can offer her is prayer and some empathetic understanding. I care about what you're going through, I tell her. I offer to pray for her.
And this all makes me think about humility in the counseling profession. Hopefully none of you by reading this think that I lack it too much for sharing this story. I am not trying to pat myself on the back at all. I am going to have to develop a lot of humility in the next few years if I am going to make it in the profession. This experience reminds me of how nerve-wracking talking to an unstable person really is. When I admit that I don't have the slightest clue what I am doing, that is when I rely on God. And that is the best place to be...both for me and the other person.
I don't want to be a solution-maker for people. People will want to raise me up to a non-human level, asking for things I can't give them. I'll be tempted to offer pat-solutions to "fix" them. But I think people need to make their own solutions. It takes some of the pressure off of me and it also makes people responsible for their own lives. I'm going to be there to help them filter what solutions might be plausible, what might be the most effective...but the truth is that I really don't know for sure. Luckily I think counseling is more about loving the other person than offering them answers. Leaves more room for God's grace to work, now doesn't it?
posted by Jackie | 9:05 PM
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